Angry Robot

1. Mouthwash 2. Cleaning Faggot 3. Synthesis

  1. Tired, I misread the product’s descriptor as “anti-Semitic” instead of “anti-septic.” Wow, Listerine’s reaching out to the racist clean-freak market, I thought. Clean the Jews out of your teeth! Of course, there’s always something fascist about cleaning products, something genocidal about the advertising copy: eradicate, eliminate, dissolve, purge, remove stains.

  2. Odd, then, that Mr. Clean is so gay. I thought maybe this was to make him less threatening to husbands. After all, here’s this magical weightlifter who appears in the home while the husband’s away at work. He “helps out” the wife, revlieves tension, dissolves hysteria etc. etc. And he’s always winking at her. But it’s okay pops, look he’s bald with the earrings and the all-white attire… I guess a more logical explanation would be an attempt to connote the gay male’s reputation for excellent personal grooming skills. Or do the ad people know something we don’t: that a straight woman’s ideal mate is actually a gay man? Men prefer lesbians, after all. If we learn nothing else, it’s that someone should release Cleaning Dyke Twins For Men® brand cleanser.
  3. I should really tie this in with Mel Gibson’s Jesusploitation film or with gay marriage or something. Aw, fuck it. clicks post

One comment on "1. Mouthwash 2. Cleaning Faggot 3. Synthesis"

  1. eL says:

    D, you left out Brawny, the lumberjack-turned-paper towel jockey. Same thing though. I think enough guys are familiar enough with the Monty Python sketch of said lumberjacks, and the association men have is that yes, he’s big, burly, and strong, but he’s got an underwire under that flannel, probably some lace panties too.

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